Wednesday, December 5, 2012

No Comment

Several others have admitted to a shared enjoyment in reading the reader comments in online recipe blogs. I will also confess here, in public, to my addiction in the comments everywhere, but especially for products offered by online retailers. You’d think that people would not care enough to offer an opinion on, say, men’s pajamas, but au contraire! They care, and care deeply.
For example, these comments on men’s pajamas from the Gap:

“The colors were different than I expected when I ordered. The stripes are grey and teal or aqua on a white background- there was more white than I expected.

.  Colors - most men don’t care or even know the difference between teal/aqua/blue etc. There was more white than she expected? Really? Does that matter?These are pajamas, not tuxedo pants-- your husband does not care about the stripes, I guarantee.

Love these thoughts on the sweatshirt hoodie, a slacker staple:

This won't function as a garment to keep you warm, but it is really cute and simple. I returned mine, but it fit me flawlessly. I got the Medium Tall size, I'm 6'4 and 170 lbs for reference. But yeah, if you want a layering hoodie or something to wear in the spring, this is good. Not for winter though.

So...he liked it but he returned it? and why would you buy a hoodie that wouldn't keep you warm? Isn't that the raison d’etre of the sweatshirt? The whole point of the hoodie(besides being warm and cozy) is to be emphatically Not Fashionable. To loudly display your complete disinterest in playing the fashion game, and also, to show that YOU don’t have to wear suits and ties, those are for the nameless drones who work for The Man.
I was pleasantly surprised to see a man use the description “cute” in his comments.

My favorite comments remain the comments on cooking blogs. The range of experience in cooks is so great that the review on a plain old cookie can be anything from 1 fork to 5 forks, depending on the cook:

I think I have to stop trusting the forks on epicurious. I now have a huge bag of these in the freezer. There is something they lack...I think it might be salt but I'm not sure. I even added some orange zest and chopped hazelnuts to some of them...still too crumbly and buttery in a bad way and not much better in the taste department. Maybe they're better with nutella?

The answer here is EVERYTHING is better with Nutella..;.next question?

These brownies were too cakey and not chocolaty enough for my taste. The former could probably be addressed by reducing to 4 eggs. But to address the chocolaty issue I'll probably just poke around for another recipe.

I think I could have a career as a recipe commenter therapist. The real problem here is a Fudgy Brownie Person has made a Cakey Brownie recipe. Like the Hatfields and McCoys, those two tribes should not be mixed. Also, brownie recipes with five eggs (!!!) should be avoided.. It’s not chocolaty enough because it’s made with melted chocolate, not cocoa - very zen but true.
Find a brownie recipe made with cocoa and fewer eggs.

And of course, some people take recipes personally, and are insulted by the very existence of a variation on a traditional bread::

First of all, challah is a bread for the Jews and it is made by certain standards and none of those standards are met with this recipe. Secondly, only Rosh HaShanah challah is round and it is made with raisins, cinnamon and honey/sugar but no seeds. The rest of the year the dough is braided as is shown in your kneading video. In my entire life I have never heard of a challah recipe with so little flour and not being kneaded. I would have no objection to this recipe if it were not called challah but this recipe is an insult to the Jews and to Challah itself.

Can’t non-Jewish people bake challah? Isn't that one of the reasons that makes America great? And what is so horrible about a quicker, easier version?
Something else is going on here besides her horror at a non-traditional baking method.
As a Recipe Therapist, I have to say, “Lighten up, sweetie”.

What’s your favorite comment? Please share.

(on a side note, I find it deeply amusing that Google spell check questioned the spelling of "hoodie". You'd think that they of all people would know , since that's all they wear at the Google campus.)


Venus de Hilo said...

hehe... enjoyed all of these, your experience with Google spell-check most of all.

The Slapdash Sewist said...

Those comments are so hilarious. I am reminded of the old saw, "When I want your opinion I'll give it to you!"

Judith said...

What a great uplifting funny post! Comments can be so entertaining, particularly the 'what-the????' ones where even the commentator has no idea what they even to have a peek around your blog...J